Looking after yourself might be the last thing on your list of priorities but it's vital that, as much as you possibly can, you take care of yourself physically, emotionally and mentally.
Here you can find information on how bereavement can affect your wellbeing, how to look after your wellbeing and get you thinking about some of the things you can do to help yourself.
In the midst of grief many of us find that we think about our own death, or even wish we were dead. It can seem like a way out of coping with the problems and pain of a drug or alcohol related bereavement. Although it is common, it is important to find someone to talk to about these feelings. If you think you might act on your feelings, you can call Samaritans on 116 123. When someone who has been a central part of our life dies we can feel hopeless and despairing.
It’s good to think about you and what makes you happy. Have a think about the following questions either on your own or with a friend. If you are on your own consider 5 minutes on each question and jot down your thoughts.
Talking is really important. Don’t feel like you need to keep your emotions inside – it is important to let these out. Has someone offered you a chance to chat? Take them up on this for going out for a coffee or don’t be afraid to call them. Having someone to talk to is very important. Check out the Get Support page here and the wellbeing resources page here, for further information and people to talk to.
Be honest with yourself. You will be going through a range of different emotions. If you are finding it difficult to cope on your own, don’t be afraid to ask for help. It is important to give yourself time and acknowledge when you are not feeling great. It may feel difficult, but it will help you in the longer term.
Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to carry on as normal. You may need to take a break from your usual responsibilities. Take small steps and don’t expect too much of yourself. It is also important to not blame yourself. Often it is too easy to think – if only I did this? Don’t be harsh on yourself.
You may not want to, but exercise is one of the best ways to make yourself feel more human again and get that feel good hormone that exercise can give you. Physical and mental health are very closely linked – therefore being active is important to help you during this time. There are many ways to be active. You could join a sports team, go for a walk, join a class, buy an exercise video, or research on YouTube (there are many free exercise videos available there). Even walking somewhere instead of driving is an achievement and praise yourself for it.
Meditation or mindfulness is a great way to reflect and consider your own wellbeing and mental health. Considering yourself in the present moment allows you to fully appreciate the moments of today. Right now – think about yourself in this present time - Take in what you see, what you hear, the smells, the emotions, the triumph, and the sorrow. This helps us to enjoy the world and allow us to get to know ourselves better.
Reading other people’s personal accounts as seen in the Personal Accounts section can be very powerful. This is important to see so you know you are not alone in your situation. There are stories similar stories out there and there is a way through this.
Similar to meditation/mindfulness – but this time make sure you have activities scheduled that are for you and that you enjoy. Make time to read a book or book yourself in for a massage. Have a look at the Wellbeing reflection time which will help you think about what you really enjoy in order to make time for yourself. There are many more resources on wellbeing. Please also look at the wellbeing resources for further information and websites.
By Domonique Bertolucci Daily inspiration for long-life happiness. So many people are waiting to feel happy. But the truth is, lasting happiness is something that you create, each and everyday, through the simple choices you make. 100 days happier invites you to make small, daily changes in the way you think and act; changes that will ultimately create a fundamental shift in the life that you are living. Based on the bestselling book ‘the Happiness Code’ and ‘its Ten Keys’, this collection of inspirational messages will inspire you to be the best you can be.